Perfection, constantly striving for the unattainable. How can I make it better, how can I be better, how can I get my voice heard, how can I give voice to others, how can I possibly make a difference in a world that doesn’t want to listen? Questions that all add up to, “When will I be completely satisfied with myself and my life for longer than a couple of minutes, hours or days. When will life be perfect? Truth, it never will be. We constantly try to live the lives we grow up believe are perfect but the truth is, we will never be able to live up to others expectations of us. We can however, live up to the expectations of ourselves. That is, as long as the only expectation we have is living up to OUR full potential, and not some unattainable alternate reality. We have to accept that life can never be that kind of perfect. We WILL make mistakes and so will those around us, but that doesn’t mean that we have to dwell in it, let all the black wholes suck in everything positive in our lives. Our full potential is living life the best we can in that moment, and that doesn’t mean that every time you aren’t doing something to build up your future you are losing out on opportunities. You are not in the future you are here, in the present moment, sitting on your couch staring out the window, right now. An right now that is your full potential. Because all the overthinking and worrying has made you sit there dwelling over how much you are disappointing yourself and others. But if you choose to accept where you are and that this is who you are NOW and not in the future, then maybe your full potential will change. You might find yourself getting of the couch, standing up and taking a few steps forward. One minute your full potential will be making dinner, getting a job, having one, starting a passion project, having fun at a party, spending time with your loved ones, and then one day you may find yourself sitting here again on the couch, worried about something else. But then you’ll realize that it’s ok, because life is perfect in all it’s imperfection. You will always be able to find your path in your own way, because you are living it one second, one hour, one day at a time. You are imperfectly perfect, embrace it.
We are constantly taught to fear it. It’s something we cannot fully understand, something that blinds us from our surroundings. During the winter it makes the negative thoughts hold on tighter, last longer. But it is also what allows us to see vibrant colors of the sun set; the stars, the moon and the city lights shine. It awakens our imagination and…wow. It’s actually kind of beautiful, the dark.